The Newell Post

I had my IVIG treatment today. One of the pre-meds administered is a steroid. It often keeps me up on the night of my treatment. So instead of going to bed at 10PM and after taking two Advil PMs, here I am writing an entry five minutes before the day after today.

I didn’t have any show that I was interested in on regular TV so I turned to Youtube as I usually do at least once or twice a day.

Tonight’s focus was on music. I started off with listening to one of my all-time Doo Wop songs, Darling Can’t You Tell, by the Clusters. I used to listen to this song when I was a kid back on Leland Avenue. It was my Mike’s record but he always let me listen to anything I wanted. The song always makes me think of him.

I then saw a recommended video with Joannie Mitchel, Both Sides Now. That, in turn, reminded me of Judy Collins and I YouTubed her as well. Both Sides as sung by Judy Collins was one of my favorites in December of 1968. The Beatles had the White Album but I asked my brother to get me a Judy Collins album preferably with Both Sides Now on it.

When listening to Both Sides Now this evening it brought back many powerful memories, none of them good.

1968 was not a particularly good year for me and I am guessing I was not alone.

I had graduated from high school having slept through that experience and in September of that year, I began to sleep at St. John’s University. I wasn’t tired but I slept nonetheless.

To say that 1968 wasn’t a particularly good year for me ignores the New York Jets winning the AFL championship game which I attended with my dear friend Mike. It was the only thing that kept me awake. Fortunately, the Jets went on to win the Super Bowl in the second week of 1969 so at least I had that.

But 1969 was as miserable a time for me as 1968 had been. The new decade just around the corner would prove to be my turning point, I woke up. I was glad to do so.

A couple of my family members who read Married With Cancer told me they never knew all that Eileen and I endured. I am guessing no one knew what I was going through during those terrible years starting in high school and ending in the spring of 1970.

I laugh a lot. I try to make others laugh a lot. So, on appearances, I guess people thought I was doing ok. Another dear friend, PJ, didn’t let my jokes get in the way of him telling me about this diet. He knew that I was a skinny guy trying to bust out but just didn’t know how. It would be more accurate to say I was afraid of doing what needed to be done.

It’s the same reason I was such a terrible student until my junior year at St.Johns. When I lost the weight, having followed PJ’s guidance, I began to read. What an enlightenment for a college student. I began to go to class, I was ready for Mensa after figuring out the connection between going to class and getting good grades.

I know I was not unique and I hope I was able to help someone else out along the way. It’s just so hard to recognize when someone is struggling, especially if that someone is a good actor.

This teenage depression affected my writing of A Bronx Boy’s Tale. I got through the eighth-grade portion of the book in a matter of days. However, the point in the book that I started high school provided such a writer’s block that no explosive could destroy. I couldn’t write the truth. I really didn’t even want to review my truth. I couldn’t wait until I got to the day I met Eileen. But first, I had to create an alternate reality for the six years of high school and college.

It’s funny how music brings such lucid memories to me. I used to listen to music when I wrote A Bronx Boy’s Tale. Just hearing the music of that time, especially the Beatles, brought me right back to Leland and Thieriot Avenues and Blessed Sacrament. I could taste the french fries at Orchard Beach.

Tonight those same memories created such powerful images for me. Images I didn’t want to see.

The good news is that unlike the positive memories of my life, these dark illusions do not stay with me that long.

Thank God, because the Jets haven’t won a Super Bowl since 1969 and there doesn’t seem to be one looming in their immediate future.

Be well and happy.

Jimmy

There is a new enemy of the people.

Well, Trump will be telling us that shortly.

The newly elected Democratic House of Representatives will certainly keep Trump tweeting.

I do hope Nancy Pelosi is elected Speaker as she seems to tick off Republicans even more than Hillary. I am surprised you haven’t heard the “Lock ‘er up” rant when her name is mentioned.

Of course, everyone is speculating that the Dems will be up Trump’s ass like a porn star’s lawyer but I am not so sure they will have the time.

I am basing my conjecture on lessons learned watching West Wing.

To the uninitiated let me explain.

President Bartlet was elected and failed to let voters know that he had MS.

He never lied but he did fail to tell the truth which turned out to be as bad as lying.

Because of this evasion of truth, the Republican House censured him.

I don’t think there were any other lies that President Bartlet told and they censured him.

My question, will the Dems censure Trump for lying and, if so, how many times?

I mean, Trump lies a dozen times a day. If he gets censured for every lie he has ever told as President and for those he will surely continue to say, he will have no time for sending troops to ward off imagined invaders. He won’t be able to hug Putin or piss off NATO.

The only one who makes out is Melania as he won’t have time to hold her hand as they disembark Air Force One. That’s something we can all appreciate.

I think we are in for two more years of nothing getting done that would make America great. No infrastructure programs. No education bills. No real tax reform.

Buy stock in cable news and you can retire at a young age. Their ratings will be off the chart as the House issues subpoena after subpoena.

Then, of course, there is Mueller.

Now that the election is over he will continue and hopefully come to a speedy resolution. Whatever the result is we need to move on.

I don’t think we will move on, however.

We are much too divided to agree on anything. Republicans are scared to stand their ground and vote with a conscience. They will kowtow to Trump and his base base.

Republicans fear these people more than they fear the Democrats. We should too.

The base will bring us all down. It will be the death of this nation if we follow their lead.

Impeachment is not an option as the Senate decides the matter and, even if Trump is impeached, we are stuck with Pence and I don’t think we want that.

What is it that the Russians say, “May you live in interesting times”?

Oh no, the Chinese say that.

Long before I signed on to Facebook, I had a page on Ning. I heard about Ning at a conference and I loved it. I still have my page, Yankeetrains.ning.com.

Yankee Baseball and Lionel Trains was a fun way to share two of my passions, the Yankees and Lionel trains. I had pictures of both and would occasionally share posts from my blog. It truly was a social medium.

To be fair, Facebook was also a social medium. I was able to connect to family across the nation. I connected with friends I hadn’t seen in years. It was terrific, and I was regularly checking for updates from all my friends on Facebook.

Now, I rarely log on.

I don’t share my blog on Facebook too often. This entry won’t appear on Facebook, but it will be on my Linkedin page and Twitter.

I got to despise Facebook during the 2016 election as more and more anti-posts appeared on my page. I have a diverse family as well as many friends who were offended by what appeared on my page. None of it was from me but who needs it?

Then I began to hear about the russians (lower case on purpose) and their despicable interference, and I am sure they were responsible for some of the posts that sullied my page.

It makes me think about a history class I had in my last year at St. John’s. We read Understanding Media by Marshall McLuhan. “The Medium Is The Message” or as someone else put it, “The Medium Is The Massage”.

One of the propositions put forth had to do with the electronic revolution and the shrinking of the world. Because of computers and the ease of communication that was possible even before the internet had been created, people of different cultures were going to connect much more easily than ever before.

When we discussed this my professor asked what happens when we find out we don’t like each other?

Well, I guess he was right. For all the joy that connecting with family and friends the Facebook experience has connected us to some people we would rather have left off our list.

I am capable of believing that some of my blogs were offensive to some and I really hope they deleted me from their friend list. It’s the American thing to do.

You don’t like MSNBC?

Changed the channel.

You don’t like Fox and Friends?

Change the channel.

It’s what they call free speech and the right of privacy.

We have the right to select what we listen to and the right to be left alone.

Exercising those rights in a respectful way will help eliminate the Anti from Social Media.

2016 posed a significant challenge to voters. I am not quite sure why. I know many did not like Hillary and, had the Republican challenger been a traditional Republican politician, say Jeb Bush or John McCain, I can see how those who did not like Hillary would have opted for the Republican candidate.

Once, however, Trump won the nomination I couldn’t imagine him winning. Coming from New York where Trump’s face was ubiquitous, I couldn’t even bring myself to watch The Apprentice much less vote for him for President.

Trump was always obnoxious and the worst stereotype of an arrogant New Yorker. I still can’t imagine how anyone living west of the Hudson and south of Staten Island could vote for such a blowhard.

Well, they did, and I hope they are happy now.

I am guessing enough of Trump’s 2016 supporters are sufficiently sick of his vile rhetoric to jump the Republican ship and restore dignity and order to Congress. We still have Trump to deal with, but he will be a frightened mouse of a President in the face of a hostile House.

But first, the Democrats have to win.

To make it easier for you I have devised a methodology to enable you to make the correct decision.

You’ve seen the horrific things perpetrated and condoned by the supporters of an unbridled second amendment. All you have to do to make it right is to vote for the candidate that the NRA does not support.

To further assist you in this just think of the babies in Newtown and the students in Parkland. You’ll do the right thing.

Remember the torch-wielding marchers in Charlottesville? Don’t vote for anyone who supports hatred.

Think of your mother and if you are blessed with a daughter and vote for the candidate that would make them proud of you.

Get your head out of the stock market, although it did take an inopportune tumble of late. You were not put on this earth to monitor your 401K. Trust me. I don’t want to lose money, and I like the fact that Obama restored our economy when he took office and I even appreciate the fact that Trump hasn’t destroyed it…yet. Nevertheless, the recovery has not been equally distributed.

Vote for the candidate more likely to help those who don’t have a stock portfolio or a 401K.

So, there you go. I used this methodology when I voted early in Florida. I hope to God it works.

As the 1960’s bled into the ’70’s music was the poetry that inspired listeners to feel, to hope, and very often to mourn.

Seemingly hours after four college students were gunned down by the National Guard on the Kent State University campus, Neil Young at the behest of David Crosby had written Ohio.

The song quickly became the anthem for young people seeking to bring an end to the Viet Nam war.

Four students dying during a protest on an American university campus within recent memory of the 1968 assassinations, reinforced the concept of America as a divided country.

There were other things that served to divide us but the war took center stage, and it appears that our nation has yet to restore the breach that was forged during those dark days.

I don’t remember hearing anything about the NRA back then. After all, lone assassins were responsible for three deaths. At Kent State, it was the National Guard who did the shooting. Today’s tragedies are quite a different story.

Despite the perceived mayhem of the sixties I never once worried about going to school.

I never worried about going to church.

I went to Times Square on New Year’s Eve and my only concern was that there might be a transit strike before I got home.

Today’s kids are not quite so lucky.

The reason kids today have much more to fear than I ever has nothing to do with Obama, Hillary, or Nancy Pelosi.

You can build the highest wall you want but it wouldn’t have protected the children in Parkland.

The wall would not have protected the worshipers at the Tree of Life Synagogue.

We can hide from the rest of the world but we cannot hide from the Second Amendment.

Shortly after Parkland, I was in an office volunteering and I was working with a woman of my generation (it’s a nice way of saying she was an old woman). I made a remark about the tragedy and she agreed that something had to be done…BUT I don’t want to take away the Second Amendment!

WHY THE FUCK NOT!

We’re not talking about the Eucharist or the Virgin Birth. We’re talking about the right to have a musket in your house on the prairie. Read the Federalist Papers. There is not one mention of an automatic rifle. I swear to God there is no mention of an AR-15 or an AK-47.

LOCK THEM UP!!!!

Too many innocent people are being killed. Too many live in fear. It’s time to have a rational gun policy and it’s time to LOCK THEM UP.

I know the NRA is scared of Nancy Pelosi. The Florida Republicans sure are as she is featured in every political ad buy for a Republican politician running scared. Just wait until next week when more women win their race and enter Congress in the new year.

We were a divided country in the sixties and seventies.

We may think we are a divided country once again. I don’t think we are. The news networks are divided. The White House wants us to be divided but Americans can see through all of that.

I can’t imagine any parent worried more about the second amendment than their child going to school.

Is anyone worried about a caravan?

The biggest threat to our democracy is the hacking of our computer systems. You can’t ever use Facebook anymore yet our government tells us to duck our head under our desk and that will protect us. We did that once before and thank God we never had to find out if it worked.

There are real dangers out there and they have absolutely nothing to do with mothers and babies.

More of us realize that all the hate that has been exposed in recent years is not American.

The thousands of Americans who have died defending the values espoused in the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution did not make the ultimate sacrifice so that a bunch of skinheads and survivalists and nationalist can stalk Americans.

They died fighting people like that.

Americans know this.

They know the truth when they see and hear it.

Maybe we just need a good song to remind us who we are.

C’mon CSNY, play us a song like you used to.

I thought American society turned the corner when Obama was elected.

It seems incredulous after two years of Trump that we ever elected a black man as President.

Back in 2009 when Obama took the oath of office, my three children decided to blow the day off and travel to Washington DC to witness history. It was that kind of event. And, it was one event that I didn’t even serve as the instigator. Going to Yankee games and Jet games and Ranger games, well, that is what I always pushed on them. As a former history teacher, however, I was never so proud of my children than when they told me they were going to the Inauguration.

Now, nine years later, there is no sense in going to Washington. Bad people work there. People who hate. People who talk about Jesus much as the pedophile priests do, with a sneer and the look of the devil.

We are going to elect a black governor in Florida. He inspires people much the same way that Obama did. Like Obama, Andrew Gillum’s journey will be fraught with danger and hatred. It’s already started.

A robo call has gone out to Floridians, some have said from the KKK, pantomiming a stereotype black voice. It’s goal, of course, to minimize and degrade the next governor of Florida.

I don’t know how we got here after 2009.

For how long have we heard from the right that our society was going to hell. Gay marriage, transgender rights, affirmative action, and immigrants, billions and billions of illegal immigrants.

Well, it seems that those topics are not causing our demise.

Unbelievably, our ruination comes as a result of those who always hid behind family values, God, and law and order.

Well, family values went out as soon as our president was taped paying off a porn star.

God? Don’t get me started. The Born Again Bigots are too busy throwing stones to realize God is no longer on their side.

Law and Order? How many aids and staff have to get indicted to blow the lid off of this?

The only law these people keep is the second amendment.

Forget about the other amendments, just let them keep their bazookas.

You know, I stopped writing for a long time because I didn’t want to get back on the soapbox. But I am still bombarded with the utter lunacy of the last two years. And now, they can’t even point to the economy as the stock market gave back all the gains made in 2018.

Well, go out and be sure to vote.

I used to think I knew what the Truth is. Even if I couldn’t define it well enough to convince a philosopher, like Justice Potter Stewart in describing pornography, I know Truth when I see it.

My dilemma?

There’s hardly any to be seen.

Thank God for the Yankees because I can at least focus on sports rather than the other national pastime of hatred.

To think that the Greatest Generation gave their lives and youth to support the American Value to hate his neighbor!

For a country that purports to aspire to religious ideals, we sure seem to cast a lot of stones even as we dodge quite a few ourselves.

Ironically, I used to complain about this type of behavior at sporting events. God forbid you wear the shirt of the opposing team. Don’t dare cheer for an opposing player. Fans have gotten killed and assaulted for daring to disrespect the home team.

Sure, those incidences have been extremely rare, and at a time when a grammar school kid or high school teenager faces a higher risk of harm than a Red Sox fan in Yankee Stadium, the latter seems almost quaint.

Our most recent example of political hatred is being played out in the Senate as Kavanaugh awaits confirmation. It’s funny to put it that way. Confirmation envisions a ten-year-old in a blue suit with a red bow on his arm. I am sure if you asked him he would rather face the slap of a bishop rather than facing the Democrats.

No matter what happens with his confirmation hatred will continue to inspire. Hatred will, in fact, replace Russian meddling as a topic of debate just as election day approaches.

Supporters of Kavanaugh and his opponents believe they have identified truth.

I wish they would share their technique with me.

Since moving to Florida, I have come to realize that summer is more a state of mind than it is a season.

For me, June 21st is the day I queue up my Summertime PlayList on my iPhone. I also shun the various IPAs (though not entirely) and hunt for Summer Ale.

Living on Long Island has conditioned me to prefer Blue Point Summer Ale over other varieties of the same concoction, but I am not really a summer ale snob and, in fact, there is not a summer ale that I have refused to imbibe.

As we are in the middle of the Labor Day weekend, my thoughts naturally turn to of autumn and the seasonal brews that follow. Yet the end of summer is more about the season than the beverage.

On Labor Days past it was a ritual for Eileen and me to stand and clap for the lifeguards at Ponquogue beach as the final whistle of summer sound.

It was a joyous moment to show our gratitude to the young women and men who protected all the beachgoers who populated our beautiful shores even as we lamented the passing of another summer.

Tomorrow would be a school day for our children and work for Eileen and me would resume. The weather would still be summer-like, and the calendar would still proclaim that summer was the season but you knew in your heart of hearts that summer was over.

Despite the prospect of continued 90 degree days for the foreseeable future down here in Bradenton, I cannot escape that same feeling that summer is once again eluding me. Another season of my life has ended.

Why is it that the passing of summer brings on this melancholy?

Who feels sad when autumn evolves into winter? The last day of autumn is a mere five days before Christmas. Surely no one is sad about that.

Then when winter ebbs and spring springs to life no need to wax poetic about winter’s passing. Baseball is right around the corner and who isn’t happy about that?

Then, summer comes, and we are all kids again remembering that last day of school and the eternal bliss of sleeping late and staying out after dark.

But, with the last of the Summer Ale comes the promise of Pumpkin Beer so, you see,  life, when the chill of autumn is upon us (and I use that term very loosely down in Florida), retains the joy of that first day of summer and the last day of school.

My Catholicism has always been a source of my identity. I went to a Catholic grammar school. I went to a Catholic High School. I went to a Catholic University and then I went to a Catholic Law School.

I taught in Catholic Schools for five years and I taught CCD or Sunday School for ten years. I even served as a lector for two years.

I believed in all of the Church teachings that pertained to Christ and his teachings. I didn’t believe in all that the Church said but I believed what Christ said and did.

I believed in the Eucharist and the Ressurection and eternal life after death.

The horrific pedophile scandals have convinced me that the bishops and Popes of recent years do not believe in those things.

How could they?

How could they let sick, perverted men under the guise of the cloth to molest innocent children with the same hands that they let these sons of bitches consecrate the bread and wine into the body and blood of Our Lord Jesus Christ?

How could they?

I’ll tell you.

They didn’t believe in anything they said from that pulpit of theirs.

The crisis that the Catholic Church faces is nothing to do with the billions of dollars that they will lose.

The crisis has nothing to do with the ultimate destruction of the hierarchy of the Church.

These villainous leaders, who were supposed to be Christ on earth, will be ultimately responsible for the destruction of the faith of nearly a billion Catholics.

Catholics are repulsed by their failure to suffer the little children.

Catholics are repulsed by our bishops lack of faith.

How can you expect us to believe in a life eternal when these charlatans didn’t fear meeting Christ face to face?

Who forgave their sins except for other charlatans who were more concerned with protecting the good reputation of an organization and cared nothing for protecting a child.

I always felt these bastards cared more for a fetus than a child. In reality, they cared for nothing but preserving the source of their own financial support.

I am angry and, I am sure all Catholics are angry.

The anger is justified but, unfortunately, completely useless.

Anger will not remove the suffering that the victims continue to endure.

Anger will not make this memory go away.

The Church that I knew will no longer exist. That is a good thing.

We need a New Catholic Church.

The New Catholic Church will do what Christ instructed the man who asked what he needed to do to be saved.

The New Catholic Church must sell all its possessions and give to the poor.

We don’t need men in funny hats or big rings for us to kiss.

We don’t need big cathedrals, make them museums.

We don’t need any more saints. In fact, no one who presided over this terrible period of pedophilia should be canonized. Pope John Paul II should have his sainthood revoked.

The best that can be said about him is that he fell asleep at the switch. The worst? He knew all about the tragedy and did nothing about it.

There should also be a permanent change to the liturgy of the mass.

To the Prayers of The Faithful should be added:

“For all the victims of sexual abuse at the hands of the clergy, we pray to the Lord.”

Lastly, priests and nuns should be able to marry, and nuns should be treated as equal in all aspects of religious life. Men and women should both be encouraged to serve and to live a life that is dedicated to preserving the dignity of the individual as well as the faith in our church teachings.

This second Reformation is needed so that people of faith continue to have a reason to believe.